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Sometimes We Would Like to Strangle Them and Then They Go Do Something Like This

Sometimes We Would Like to Strangle Them and Then They Go Do Something Like This

While non-parents may be horrified, I consider beating the crap out of my kids on an almost daily basis. One is hitting puberty and thinks that not only his snotty attitude is actually “comedic” but that I am his personal assistant. The other one chucks his teeth when asked to do homework, constantly leaves my basement floor full of lego pieces which I invariably step on EVERY DAY.  Ever step on a lego barefoot???? They are lucky they have not yet been maimed.

We had a particularly rough night with Ginger (Matt has auburn hair) and his inability to focus on anything but the opposite sex.

Ginger has girls on the brain

To make matters worse, Ginger and I missed the bus this morning.  So now I have to drive him all the way up to Kellenberg…in traffic.  If you live on Long Island, the parkways are a disaster from 7 am on.  I also had to wake up Ran who was not very happy about the situation.  He demanded that I go away and leave him home.  I can’t do that – he is 9. So, slow as molasses, he eats breakfast and gets dressed. Now the drive to Kellenberg has turned into a game of “Beat the Clock” and I am careening around corners and flying up the Meadowbrook.  If he is “tardy”, they give detention and I was damned if I was gonna traipse up there again today! Ginger fished a pieces of loose leaf and a pen out of his backpack so I could draft a note on the fly if we were going to be late.  Thankfully, we pulled into the parking lot in the nick of time and I shoved him out the door (I did come to a stop first).  Ryan and I got home rather quickly, I got his lunch together and took him to Meadow.

When I got back in my truck to go home and turn myself into a human being, I found this on the car seat:

Now I’m gonna have to bake brownies or something. Dagnamit!!!!!

 

 

The Magic of Miche