funny – Long Island Chick

Why Cleaning Is So Rewarding

Kathleen — Fri, 15 Apr 2016 16:30:21 +0000

With Miche going out of business, it was time to inventory my collection. To do that, required cleaning out the basement. You have no idea what our basement has degenerated to. It’s a cesspool filled with old toys, broken things, piles of tiny little things like nerf bullets, lego pieces, linkin logs, bakugan to name a few. Let me put it this way…I have to pass this room the get to our laundry room, pantry etc and I just look straight ahead and avoid eye contact with this monster.

But, now it needs our attention. This is going to be torture as I can’t even see the carpet. One by one I sort the little things into boxes. Oh Star Wars figures…those damn things are littered everywhere as well. Looks as if the Death Star scored a direct hit on our basement. But I digress.

While I was sorting all these crap that covered the Thomas the Tank Engine train table (did I mention my boys are 13 and 16 now?), I came across this little gem:

Ok. Let’s look at this. Apparently the boys decided to have a party at some point in time and judging from the handwriting it was a while ago. And they invited their father but not me? Really?! Getting past this possible slight, the boys were apparently concerned that Danny might not behave…so concerned they needed him to execute an agreement to behave. What kind of mischief, on the part of their father, prompted the necessity for a contract? We may never know.

Only My Kid!

Kathleen — Sat, 24 Mar 2012 20:41:49 +0000

Going somewhere or doing anything with Ryan can be quite an adventure – you just never know what he is likely to do. Ryan marches to the beat of his own drum and doesn’t worry about social norms and mores (for the most part). One “Ryan Adventure” that we still laugh about was the first time Ryan had to go to “mandatory mass” (the religious education program at our church requires the children to go to certain grade level masses). My husband took him and it was probably the most painful hour in his life. Ryan farted loudly on the wooden bench (you know what that sounds like?!) and when Dan glared at him he whispered loudly “sorry, sorry, sorry – it slipped”. Of course this didn’t happen during everyone singing. Oh no, this was during a prayer being conducted by the priest alone and he had fallen silent so everyone could pray for their own intentions…silently.

: the acoustics!!!

Of course, it didn’t stop there. Ryan wanted to know what the “sink” (baptismal fount) was; he mouthed the words because he didn’t want people to know he did not yet know the words and so forth. Danny was so totally embarrassed and I laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants. Now I digress but I needed to give you some background. That church episode took place about 3-4 years ago. Today, Ryan had to go to church to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation.

For those of you who aren’t Catholic, the Sacrament of Reconcilation or Confession allows the sinner to confess their sins to the priest and be absolved of them after doing a penance. Ryan’s 4th grade religious education class was scheduled for this afternoon so off we went. I gave him the sheet that outlined the process with the appropriate words and prayers. The religious education director called him up to wait for his turn to go into the confessional. As he was 2nd online, Ryan’s turn came pretty quick and Danny, Matty and I watched carefully from our pew. Now, Ryan had decided ahead of time he did not want to go “face to face” but traditional. But, when he went in the confessional, he went into the face to face by mistake. Instead of staying there, Ryan walked out and went in the traditional side. We couldn’t imagine what was the point since the priest already saw you but well hey, that’s Ryan.

He was in there for a while and I couldn’t imagine what he was saying. He is only 9 – what could he have done? But, I know sometimes the priests take a bit longer because the kids are still new at it. Finally, he came out and he went to the rail to say the prayers that were part of his penance. Now, the church has a row of electric votive candles at the railing and Ryan knelt there and began to pray. I took one look at that row of dark, unlit candles and I knew there would be no way he would be able to resist.

: just press the button and voila! let there be light!

I turned to Dan and Matt and you could see they too had the same thought. So we turned and watched Ryan, kneeling there all angelic. All of a sudden, one candle flickered to life. Then another. And another – bing, bing, bing until at least 7 or so were flickering merrily. We could barely contain our laughter! They we are sitting in a solemn church with all the statues covered up (a bit creepy if you asked me) and the Desio family is laughing. Great – yeah us the irreverent bunch. Finally, Ryan returned to our pew and we told him you aren’t supposed to light the candles without making a donation. Ryan looked at us contritely and Dan fished out a few dollars from his pocket and told Ryan to go back up and make the donation – BUT DON’T LIGHT ANY MORE CANDLES! Ryan did what he was told and then we left with a smile on our faces and in our hearts – Ryan never fails to disappoint!

Coffee Catastrophe…AVERTED!

Kathleen — Fri, 23 Mar 2012 15:36:02 +0000

I, like most adults, must have my morning coffee. MUST. I have a Keurig machine to make the process of getting the caffeine into my bloodstream as easy as possible. Now, on occasion, I run out of the little K-Cups. That occasion occurred this morning. I figured ok, no worries, I have that sampler box that came with the Keurig. I’ll just have to go down to the pantry in our basement (ugh another set of stairs to navigate???) , grab a K-Cup and be merrily on my way to my caffeinated high. So I trudged downstairs, grabbed the box from the pantry and opened in in my kitchen:

By now, panic has set in. What am I going to do? How am I going to even drive Matty to the bus stop? Think. Think. THINK!!! Maybe one fell out onto the pantry floor that has some umpfh to it? Wait! Didn’t Santa put some K-Cup boxes under the tree for me? I think he did that wonderful, fat man (talking about Santa)! Praying I didn’t already use up my Santa stash, I trudged back down the stairs and peered into the dark recesses of the pantry. Way in the back on the bottom of the shelf, I saw:

Ahhhh!!!! Thank the Coffee Gods! Not only caffeinated but a nice, dark roast! The kind of coffee that, as my Dad would say, “will put hair on your chest”! Not that I want hair on my chest or have any but, yeah I know TMI.

Happy Friday everyone and hopefully if you need your caffeine infusion like I do, you got it on this lovely Friday!!!

Create Memories Instead of Regrets: Videotape Your Kids Often!

Kathleen — Sun, 18 Mar 2012 19:00:39 +0000

With the advent of handheld technology, there is absolutely no reason you should not be videotaping your kids every opportunity you have. Don’t wait for special occasions or holidays either – make sure you capture every day moments as often, these are the most precious. One of my favorite videos of my kids was actually taken in the bathroom:

As you can see, my Ryan was such a little wiseguy! I completely forgot about this until I decided to download all the video to the computer with the intent of creating some family video dvd (a subject of a future post).

To get those every day moments make sure your video camera is handy and CHARGED. If your home videos are anything like mine, you will hear your husband’s voice saying “honey I only have a few minutes of battery left…” UGH! A video camera in its bag, tucked away in a closet isn’t capturing anything. If your cell phone has a video recording feature, make sure you know how to use it. Cell phones are wonderful for capturing candid video and that video can easily be uploaded to facebook and YouTube for sharing.

Here are 5 tips to improve your videotaping skills to make sure you capture the moment perfectly:

Get down to their level

When videotaping kids, try to get eye-level with them, whether on your knees, the floor, or a low chair. This position allows for greater interaction with the children.

Keep the Tape Rolling

Don’t be so quick to turn off the camera when the event you are capturing is finished. When you feel you have captured the performance or giggle, let the camera continue to recordl for another minute or two. Some of the best moments happen unexpectedly, so if you have the camera on and focused on the subject, you’re more likely to get them on tape.

Keep Camera Movement Down to a Minimum

Don’t use a lot of movement with the camera. Feel free to adjust your shot according to what is taking place but minimize zooming and panning. Your subject should be providing the movement, not the camera. Here is a tip: when you see something you want to record, get a nice long shot of whatever is happening without any camera movement (zoom or panning) whatsoever. Then, move in to adjust the shot and then let it roll for a while. This way you will have both a wide-shot of the activity (something that shows all the action) and a close up.

Fill the Frame With Your Subject

This is especially important when videotaping infants. Some of the best video is where you can see the expressiveness in a baby’s face when she is playing peek-a-boo, or her determination in trying to get the spoon from the cereal to her mouth. Don’t be afraid to get really close!

Flip the Screen

Toddlers are such hams and if you flip around the LCD screen on the camera so the kids can see themselves in action you’ll a) get a nice extended close up shot because most children can focus on themselves for a while, and b) you’ll get some hysterical footage as kids figure out who’s on the screen and start making faces at themselves!

Remember, they are little only once and these movies are the best family movies! Get out there are video tape!

Freaky Friday: Trapped Inside the Phone

Kathleen — Fri, 16 Mar 2012 21:03:36 +0000

I saw this on Pinterest and thought it was pure genius:

So I grabbed my son and took a picture of him behind some glass for my phone contact and here is our version:

Thanks guys at 9GAG! Now go take some pictures and have some fun!